Love Is Watching Someone Die

I'm so confused. I hate that I have trouble controlling my emotions. And making sense out of it.

I feel like crying, and I have no idea why...

If you think it's V-Day, then you're wrong... I have a Valentine. Who obviously likes me very much. He's so sweet. He got me a Valentine gift. But I still feel unhappy.

I feel like he deserves someone so much better than me. I just screw up everything. But I'm too attached to him to let go. In a way, I do like him, but I don't know if it's enough... I miss him though... I'm such a loser.

Anyway, here are lyrics to the song I'm currently loving, stumbled upon it by accident actually =)

Sad song, but beautiful, moving lyrics.

What Sarah Said - Death Cab For Cutie

And it came to me then that every plan is a tiny prayer to father time
As I stared at my shoes in the ICU that reeked of piss and 409
And I rationed my breaths as I said to myself that I'd already taken too much today
As each descending peak of the LCD took you a little farther away from me

Amongst the vending machines and year-old magazines in a place where we only say goodbye
It stung like a violent wind that our memories depend on a faulty camera in our minds
But I knew that you were a truth I would rather lose than to have never lain beside at all
And I looked around at all the eyes on the ground as the TV entertained itself

'Cause there's no comfort in the waiting room
Just nervous pacers bracing for bad news
And then the nurse comes round and everyone will lift their heads
But I'm thinking of what Sarah said that "Love is watching someone die"

So who's going to watch you die?..