Whoopa!

Yay I start work tomorrow! I think boredom has been a major part of my crankiness for the past few weeks. I'm seriously in a good mood now. Finally had a long conversation with my father in ages. Before I was just too damned cranky to talk. I feel bad now eh. -_-"

So many young'ns at Nautika. Some of them look familiar. Maybe SMSA juniors? Anyway Sharon was the first person I saw. Apparently she only started work there last Friday. And she's gonna be there till end of July. I'm replacing someone who's going on maternity leave so I'm supposed to be there till 7th August. I don't know when uni is starting. Hopefully after 7th August. I don't wanna miss anything oh! *geek mode*

It wasn't so much an interview as a brief, er, briefing. Hehe. It's brief-er than a briefing lah. Just tell me about the pay and working hours and such. And then finish. I was like, that's it?

LOL I am telling my sister that I'm starting work tomorrow. Freaking gullible lah this person.

--

SomEwheRe oVer D raiNboW~~~ says (1:21 PM):
what u mean jobless i am no more?
bellaaaa wheeee jobless i am no more! :D says (1:22 PM):
i start work tomorrow
SomEwheRe oVer D raiNboW~~~ says (1:22 PM):
really?
bellaaaa wheeee jobless i am no more! :D says (1:22 PM):
yah
SomEwheRe oVer D raiNboW~~~ says (1:22 PM):
where? as what ?
bellaaaa wheeee jobless i am no more! :D says (1:22 PM):
at gurkha
SomEwheRe oVer D raiNboW~~~ says (1:22 PM):
sial... banar kah
apa?
bellaaaa wheeee jobless i am no more! :D says (1:22 PM):
yeaaaa
i'm not sure yet
bellaaaa wheeee jobless i am no more! :D says (1:23 PM):
but they wanted someone for a month only
and they wanted someone young
female
dunno why though
SomEwheRe oVer D raiNboW~~~ says (1:23 PM):
ohhhh
bellaaaa wheeee jobless i am no more! :D says (1:23 PM):
weird lah
SomEwheRe oVer D raiNboW~~~ says (1:23 PM):
yakahh
when u apply gurkha?
bellaaaa wheeee jobless i am no more! :D says (1:23 PM):
baru
my friend told me about it
SomEwheRe oVer D raiNboW~~~ says (1:24 PM):
and ... u dno what the job is about
?
karang jual burid krg susah lagi....
*burit
hahahahaha
bellaaaa wheeee jobless i am no more! :D says (1:24 PM):
HAHAHAHAHHA why u so paloi
i tell u i work gurkha u believe also
TALOR

--

Don't pretend lah. I know you believe me a bit lah. You believe me 10% only still kira believe. =P

Anyway I am working at Nautika!

I think my new bras brought me good luck *random* HAHAHAHAH

Seriously in a good mood lah. Going up Bandar later. My dad's birthday tomorrow. He is 60 years old! Believe it or not! Minus his big belly and his super tanned skin, my dad is still good looking lah. Still has his thick thick BLACK hair. Not that much uban! I want like that also when I turn 60!

Anyway. Nothing more to say except for thanks Ryan and Mandy for thinking of me for the job! HAHAH! I belanja you sushi. And by belanja you sushi, I mean belanja the tea only. ONE DOLLAR. HAHAHAHAHAHA

The Art of Giving

Hellooo again!

I may or may not be getting a job soon. I don't wanna jinx it so I'm gonna shut up about it now.

Crap, what I wanna blog about already ah? Forgot.

Hmmmmmmmmmm.

Oh yeah! I was just thinking about random stuff bah, and I realised that a LOT of my friends' birthdays are coming up. I just feel bad because I very very very very rarely give gifts (although I love receiving them).

It's not that I'm stingy or anything (I'm not, honestly!) but I am totally CLUELESS on what to give. I really don't know. My own family also I don't buy gifts wah. I suck! =(

How can I perfect the art of gift-giving? Anyone? *readies pen and notepad*

Anyhoooooo you people whose birthdays' coming up! Tell me what you want ar! Will make life easier for me tu! hint hint a bit also can. HAAHAHHAHAH

And me?

A simple greeting is good enough for me. *looks down humbly* ^_^

HAHHAAHAH seriously I'm just happy if people actually remember. Very sad lah if my OLD OLD friends actually forgot my birthday. Oh Rin? =)

Shite I can't decide if I wanna go out or not tonight... It's raining though, so I kinda malas lah.

AH I have not seen certain people in WEEKS!! TZEN! RYAN! SHEENA! GRACE!! MANDY!!! (I forgot I saw you last night, but only for a while.) Oh but I saw Ryan's car last night. And my parents saw Tzen yesterday morning. HAHAHHA yeah. Random~

I been a hermit! =)

Okeh I wanna shower. Bye bye

Do The Can-Can

I just realised that Singlish has a high usage in the word "can".

Say can, then say cannot. How can liddat? Be consistent, can or not?

Hahaha. Funny wah. I seriously think Singlish is one of the most fun languages (is it considered a language?) around. Just the fun of mutilating the English language.... *sighs happily*

That reminds me of a tongue twister I once heard from a friend that I found hilarious. Later, I was telling my sister about it.

Bella: Hey hey wanna hear a funny tongue twister?
Vicki: What is it?
Bella: "Can you can a can like a canner can can a can?"
Vicki: ......
Vicki: CAAAANNNN!!!!~

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I still find that freaking hilarious lah. It's just too perfect. HAHAHA

Random topic? Blame this person with his new blog skin (What's tur kua dammit?!)

Sorry Alyaa no long post today, but the randomness is still there.

Yeah, I very random you know! You got problem is it? You think I care? I don't care laaaaaaaaa~~~

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *runs away like a lunatic*

Lazy Days, Lazy Bum

Hmm is there some weird explanation as to WHY I would have that lame-ass song Stuck In My Heart by C21 playing over and over in my head? I hate that song. OUT OF MY HEAD DEMON!

Anyhooo.

I have been doing NOTHING for the past 2 days. Almost literally nothing. Unless lying around counts for something...

I AM SO EFFING BORED. DAMMIT!

I could go out... but I am also broke. Very kesian one. So wanna do something also cannot. Besides, there's only so much you could do around Belait.

Last time I went out would be Monday. Wow. It seems like ages ago. Anyway, hung out with Rinnayy, Yussie and LinaLina, then with Wil afterwards.

And that was the last that I've seen of the outside world.

I've been either reading or watching TV for two days. I think I finished like 3 books over the past 2 days.

(Yes this is a very boring post.)

*thinks hard for something interesting to blog*

Can I talk about me again?

*looks around* Oh wait, this is MY blog. Ha-ha. Silly me. Of course I can be self-absorbed here.

The world might not revolve around me, but this blog definitely does. Ha-Ha~

---

I don't know how to explain this, but I think I have trouble showing affection. I mean, I can, but at first I tend to be very stiff and awkward. It's like a door with a very tricky lock. You work hard at it over a long period of time but when you finally get it open... umm... damn, that metaphor went to shit. It took me ages to get to this level of comfort that I now have with my boyfriend. Who, by the way, is the complete opposite of me in this case. Affectionate like crazy. "Touchy" was how my friends described him before I actually knew him. Haha. Someone *ahem* actually made me sit in between him and her so that he wouldn't be within touching range. She thought I would be a sufficient barrier since we were practically strangers at that time. That didn't stop him did it?! HAHAHAHAHA

Wow that was ages ago.

I was perusing through his pictures in his laptop the other night and stumbled across a picture of the both of us, which I had no recollection of posing for.

Bella: EH! *points at laptop* What's this??
Idiotbf: Hah?
Bella: This bah? When was this??? *amazed*
Idiotbf: Oh hahaha *sheepish laughter*
Bella: Wow, that was a long time ago wasn't it? I don't remember that.

Then we just smiled at each other goofily. HAHAHAHAHAHA ok lah, I just wanted to reminisce bah... Don't vomit.

=D

---

MEH!

I just felt like saying that. And I'm gonna make this post as LONG as possible. Because I like long posts. FUN FUN FUN!

Yesterday was dumpling day kan? I did not venture to the outside world. Go outside my house also don't have. Too malas already.

Doing nothing all the time always make me feel sooo laaaaazzzyyyyyyyyyyyy~

I am now too lazy to even GO OUT.

Yes, like that also can. Unless someone pick me up lah then ok. I am too lazy to drive already. I hate driving now. Because I suck at it.

Du du du~ I am living in denial right now. Carpe diem people! Seize the day! Don't overthink about the future, and just live in the today and now.

What I talk about? NOTHING LAH. I told you I'm gonna try to elongate this post so I just talk crap lah.

Haha, nada wah. I meant that he's leaving next month but we don't seem to care right now. Whee!

But back to denial again.

---
^what is up with me and those hyphen-separators? It signifies the end of one rant and moving onwards to another.

I want to kidnap either Rinnayy's or Yussie's hard disk. Ugly Betty!! Grey's Anatomy!! Lost!! Ermm... even Hana Yori Dango also I want!! Eee~ OHH and I want Yussie's COMPLETE collection of F.R.I.E.N.D.S.!!!!! ALL SEASONS WAH!! I WANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *note: ask her to bring on Friday*

I need to get out of the house actually... But somehow I enjoy this doing-nothing-phase that I'm in, because in about a month I will be starting uni again, and during that time I'm pretty sure I'm gonna be whining about how I miss the holidays. Oh oh but during that time boyfriend will be gone already so maybe it's a good thing I'll be busy....

*sinking feeling in stomach*

Gah. So much for denial. I am dreading that time, even more so since it now seems very close. I can't believe it's the middle of June already. I think I've pretty much given up on finding a job. I'll just try to cut down on my spending next month so I can save my way to Singapore at the end of this year.

I now feel pressured to because I mistakenly mentioned my then half-baked plan to go Singapore to some of my friends one too many times. Eh, if I cannot go how? HAHAHAHAHA No lar I want bah I want. I wanna get out of Brunei lar.

Travelling~ Travelling~

Ermmmmmm... I am PSYCHED about Harry Potter the book and the movie!! WHOOO! Cannot wait!!!!! Daniel Radcliffe is so grown-up! And I seriously cannot wait to find out what happens in the 7th book. I've just reread the 6th book a few days ago. I still think that Snape is not evil. And there is no way that Dumbledore's coming back okay. OH OH and I think R.A.B. is Sirius' brother, Regulus Black. That A. must stand for a middle name. Because kan, the note said, "...I know I will be dead long before you read this..." and it was mentioned earlier that Regulus Black was a Death Eater that betrayed Voldemort so he only survived a few days on the run before he was killed. So maybe during that few days he actually went to that cave and stole the Horcrux? I think I am right!! Yes yes!! I hope nobody else that's important would die in the 7th book. Please lah, J.K. Rowling... My heart cannot take any more... So much pain... =(

HAHAHA I love Harry Potter!~~~~ Cannot wait!! =D

Bah I think enough crappy rambles. This post is seriously so long. So much words, so little said.

=P

Laters~

Just For Show

I blogged. =)

Saya sakit perut.

Actually no I don't have a stomachache, but that just came out of nowhere.

Hey people, I am weird.

Wee~ UK besties are back!! LA LA LA!

Itchy Fingers

Hello!! Wow I am on a blogging streak aren't I? HAHAHAHAHA. I just felt the urge to blog that's all.

No more talking about my moodiness for now.

I went to church just now. Usually, my mind tends to wander during the duration of the mass. But I did pay attention to the sermon this time (well, parts of it lah). Anyway the priest mentioned something that I thought was quite nicely put.

I think I've mentioned before about how it frustrated me that people always seem to want to change who I am. How I have all these flaws that supposedly "taints" the person that I could be. And I got all pissy about how if I changed who I am, then I wouldn't be ME, Bella, the pissy sarcastic bitchy lazy bum that I am. Anyway the priest said this:

"The only way to cure people's faults is by loving them. If you accept them as they are, then their faults won't matter, there are NO faults..."

Something along those lines lah. Don't you agree with that boys and girls? HAHA. I was exchanging smirks with my sister because we know how it is always trying to live up to a certain someone's impossible expectations all the time.

We noticed that the individual was on his best behaviour during dinner. And I whispered to my sister, "Wow I guess he took the sermon to heart huh?"

She smirked and said, "I give it a day at most."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

So mean lah.

---

I really hate people who are judgemental. Especially if they won't give second chances. People make mistakes right? I am mostly perceived to be this snooty bitch or something. Or for certain people, I think they have an impression that I'm a slut. =/

The bitch one I understand lo... I think I look really bitchy lar, especially when I'm not smiling. =( And I tend to make really mean comments about people. (But they're funny comments, no? People always laugh) Haha, and then when I really don't want to be hit on by perverted strangers I always put on my bitchiest look. If got sunglasses the effect is even better lah.

Seria Plaza on Sundays is like the venue for the Perverts Convention bah. If I have to go there I usually prefer to have someone with me. I really feel vulnerable under their leers scrutiny. Disgusting!! I am SURE almost everyone has experienced it. It used to really bother me, but now I just put on my Mega Bitch mask so they don't bother me.

Bella's guide to repelling unwanted attention from inferior beings strangers:

• Square your shoulders prior to walking into their line of vision
• Tilt your head up slightly so your nose is in the air
• Wear a slight frown, and make sure there is a hint of distaste in your expression, like there is an unpleasant smell
• If you accidentally make eye contact(God forbid!!!), don't look away immediately as this may come off as shy(ew) or worse, coy(EW EW). Narrow your eyes slightly to show hostility, roll your eyes and THEN look away. (More famously known as jaling mata! HAHA) Note: Don't hold their gaze for more than a second, they may be encouraged by this. EW.
• Walk like you're the shit. I really can't put it in any other way. What I mean by 'the shit', isn't that you're stinky or smelly or look like this twirly brown turd, but like you're HAWT. Fo' sheezy? LOL
• I think the point above does not make much sense. Basically walk with these thoughts on your mind, "I am WAY WAY WAY out of thy league lower beings. Thou are not WORTHY to touch my scuffed up heels, much less the soles of my feet." Also, imagine that This Is Why I'm Hot by Mims is playing in the background. This is why, this is why, this is why I'm hot. I'm hot coz I'm fly, you ain't coz you not

Okely dokely? That is all.

---

Shit, I just reread what I wrote, and I realised that it is freakin PROOF of what a bitch I am. But I still am gonna post it coz I think it's funny helpful. Hohoho.

Ermmm... can't think of anything else to say. Bah bah see ya people.

ps: Mandy mana your blog? Saya click tidak ada. You change URL takde bagitau? WHY? >=(

So Full of Crap(paccino)

I hate myself!! Wheeeeeee~~~

(I am trying to express my anger in a positive way)

You know what I just LOVE?

That my life totally sucks. Oh yes it is so wunnerfuuullllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll

I love love loveeee the fact that I get so much shit from people.

Oh yahh oh yahhhh

Plus right, having Hitler as half of the parental unit is also wunnerfullll..

NAZI!

I am the offspring of a NAZI!

YARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

......

Okay I'm sorry bout that. I just felt like talking crap.

OH speaking of crap.

I was at Fratini's with Rinnayyyy just now because she had cravings for delicious cakes. She had tiramisu. I had choc pudding. YUMMILICIOUS.

And we had Crappaccino for beverages.

No, not Cappuccino, nor Frappuccino, BUT Crappacino.(Ok I am blinded by all the double c's and p's so I don't even know if I spelled[spelt? DAMMIT] them right)

It sounds funny doesn't it? You can imagine a scene going like this:

PersonA: Can I have a cappuccino please?

Waiter: Yes miss. Right away.

*minutes later cappuccino arrives*

PersonA: *sips*

PersonA: *chokes* OH GAWD

FriendB: What's wrong?

PersonA: This tastes horrible!!!! I thought I ordered a Cappuccino not CRAPPACCINO!!!

--

Kan kan kan? It doesn't sound like a real drink!!!! HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHA

But it tastes ok lah. Regardless of the name.

LOL

Death By Moodiness

Is there such a thing as Post-Menstrual Syndrome? Because if there is, then that would explain what I've just been through.

I wondered why my PMS this month wasn't as bad as usual.

Usual PMS-ing Bella:
-cranky
-major depression
-major zit outbreak
-horrible mood swings, as in =) -> =( -> =) -> =( -> =D -> >=( -> T.T

Heheh okay I kinda went overboard with the emoticons there but you catch my drift.

Anyway so when my period finally came around, it surprised me, because my usual emotional depression episodes hasn't happened yet. Which came as a relief, because honestly, all those emotions can be exhausting. I did get a really really horribly bad back cramp, which was actually why I had trouble sleeping last Saturday night (refer to previous post)

So my period usually lasts a week, so I was happily looking forward to it ending.

Tuesday I woke up feeling like I had nothing to live for. Basically my mindset was, What's the point? There is nothing for me in this world, blah blah blah. And I seriously cannot figure out what triggered this depression. At least I didn't mope around the house that day, I went up to Bandar with Tzen instead.

Checked out Supp list at UBD.... (Yay we're not on it) Had lunch. Then we couldn't figure out where to go so we went back to KB and hung out at Ryan's.

This was already in the afternoon and my depression has NOT gone away. I even cried a little when I was at Ryan's place.

Distracted ourselves by playing Dirty Scrabble. What is Dirty Scrabble? Just basically Scrabble except your words have to be of a sexual nature. Which is really much more challenging that ordinary scrabble really. Words such as rod, pole, wet and turdz came up. Yes turdz. Oh, and let's not forget arf. Hahah that was fun. I think if a sane person walked into that room, he would be extremely confused. Especially by the arf.

Oh I've digressed haven't I? Basically I was frickin depressed lah. And it still has not gone away. Actually I started to feel better this afternoon. But then I got my exam results. Then I went back to feeling crappy and worthless again.

Blah. Oh and my boyfriend usually gets the worst of my moods. Right now silent treatment again. Haha.

I miss Bandar. That 6 o'clock curfew seriously better not happen.

You know what I realised about myself? I am such a dramatic person. Why is that?

I usually make a big deal out of something that's not so life-shattering. Why lah? I really hate myself sometimes oh. Sigh. Sometimes I hear myself whining and I get annoyed at myself. Why hasn't anyone slapped me silly already? Why does anyone put up with my shit? Honestly, people. *glares*

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. omg I crack myself up.

ps: My exam results sucked la. SUCKED ASS TOTALLY and I have no one else to blame but MYSELF as I am a stupid stupid moody girl. LOL

Insomniac

Hey people, guess what? I have not had any sleep since waking up yesterday at 10am. Yes you read that right. And I don't feel so dead. I seriously don't know what's wrong man. It's like an advanced level of insomnia or something. I can't sleep.

Supplementary results are out. I heard it from a girl who was living in the same corridor with me in hostel. I bumped into her this morning at Guardian. Apparently she's working there. Damn, I seriously should get a job. NO ONE WANTS TO HIRE ME! =(

The holidays so far has not gone so well. I'm always miserable at home and I'm hating life right now. It's like reliving last year's A level hols. I hated it. I want to start uni again. I want to get out of the house so I won't feel suffocated anymore.

Yesterday shall always remain a fond memory for me.

To Alyaa, I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. I hope you and your family are coping well. And even though the timing's not right, but happy belated birthday. *hugs*

What I am listening to:
- Your Guardian Angel by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
- Somewhere Over The Rainbow/What a Wonderful World by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole (yes it's a mouthful, but I love this song)
- Everything by Michael Buble (I love his voice)

Download them please. I likey likey.

Speed Blogging

I'm indulging my last minute urge to blog. Yes I realise it is 6.30am on a Sunday morning. What do good Catholics do on Sundays? *polishes halo*

My back achesssssssssssss.

And I make a horrible horrible girlfriend.

It has been 3 months!

3 turbulent months. =)

Oh God, I need sleep. (Only had 2 hours)

I am frustrated.

gtg cyarssssssss

Vent

You know what sucks? Being unjustifiably accused.

I absolutely hate it that when I am being honest, I am accused of lying. It's not like I'm a saint. I do lie. But I don't enjoy it. And I haven't told a huge white lie in a while.

But I have been accused of lying, like when I go out and say I'm going out with this person, I get: "You better be going out with whoever you SAY you're going out with." WTF? I don't use other people's names ok. When I lie, I don't implicate others.

I also hate hypocrites.

You freaking lie to everyone all the time, even your own siblings what. And don't think I don't know what the hell you've been thinking/saying about me. I've lived with you for almost two decades, I know how your mind works. When you try to insinuate double meanings, it just pisses me off. I am being upfront with you right now. I am telling you I am going out with my boyfriend for dinner. The next day I tell you I'm going out with two girlfriends. And you say, You say you go out with them, you don't make any detours ah. HEY, who the hell do you think I am? Wasn't I honest the night before? Why would I lie some more? Why are you so damned suspicious of me? I don't hang out with the wrong crowd. I get good grades. Fuck lar. I don't deserve this kind of treatment.

I am so damn pissed off right now. Is it any wonder that I'm fucked up? EEEE. CB banar.

Okay I'm trying to calm down.

---

Let me tell you about my little adorable niece. She's so mischievous, and damned entertaining.

Last night, we had a dinner at my aunt's place, because relatives from Labuan were visiting. One of my nieces from Labuan, Adrianne, was playing with my other niece(who's Bruneian), Melvina, who we all call Girl.

Anyway, Adrianne has this Barney backpack that Girl likes. So she was sort of hogging it and pretending it was hers by wearing it around her house. At first both girls were giggling happily. But Adrianne got upset when Girl refused to return the backpack to her. Adrianne started crying. Loudly.

Adrianne: WaAaaaaaaa!!!! *bawling*
Girl: ??? (clueless as to why Adrianne was crying)
Girl's mother: Nahhhh you see she cry already. You made her cry... Boooohh...
Girl: *points to Adrianne* Nangis?
Girl's mother: Yeah... give back the bag, Adrianne nangis already.
Girl: *stares in confusion at everyone*
Girl's mother: Give back bahh
Girl: *gives back the Barney backpack*
Adrianne: *clutches onto the purple bag, still crying*
Girl: *peers in worry at Adrianne because she was still crying*
Girl: *yells at top of her voice* TEACHER!!!!! SOMEBODY CRY!!!!
Girl's mother: Eh where got teacher here
Girl: *spots my uncle* TEACHERRRR SHE CRY!!!
Uncle: Ha?
Girl: *addresses my dad* SOMEBODY CRY!!
Dad: Ha? Who cry?

Everyone laughs. Girl, who delights in laughter, joins in.

Adrianne stops crying, sniffling.

Girl: *pats Adrianne on the head* Ok?
Adrianne: *nods*
Girl: *puts palm out* Bag?

HAHAHAHAHHAHA so cute one that girl. I wanna have a daughter just like her, difficult, but damned funny and adorable.

ps: I dreamt of the stupid monitor lizard two nights ago!!!! In my dream it jumped onto my car ahhhh!! AND I saw another monitor lizard today!! OMG they're everywhere!!!!